Welcome back to the Two Dudes, Brews, & Books’ coverage of the Republican National Convention – a recap of day 2. Listen, I’m going to be 100% honest and let you know right away that I blatantly ignored most parts of this for America’s Got Talent. That kid who switch the corners of the $100 bill and the $1 bill was freaking amazing!
However, in the parts that I did catch, I realized there wasn’t enough rum in all the Caribbean to make a person sit through the entire thing. So, in a “where did all the rum go” kind of spirit, we’re breaking down my three takeaways from day 2.
Melania Trump’s Speech – Why do we care?
Yeah she ripped off Michelle Obama’s speech, big deal. There I said it – I don’t care. Honestly, how many people out there even remember what Michelle said eight years ago? Hardly a person, that’s who. Maybe I’m just cynical and sleep deprived, but I feel there are better things to complain about in the world than Trump’s wife saying the same stuff every potential First Lady has ever said. Rant over.
Chris Christie with Special Guest, Jack Crosby
I let New Jersey native, and fellow author, Jack Crosby have this one: “As the governor of my former state (my parents still live there), seeing Christie barely being able to stand up at the podium was ridiculous. Sure, there was a lot pomp and circumstance revolving around his Convict Hillary thing, but he could barely breathe. Half the time I watched him speak, I was worried he was either going to have an asthma attack or a heart attack. Chris, put the red meat down and go grab a salad for the love of all things holy.”
*This happened during America’s Got Talent, so I have nothing.
Donald Trump Jr. and His One Liners
He learned from people with masters degrees in hard knocks. He thinks schools are elevators to the middle class or something like that. Yep, the Donald’s son was on a roll last night. Still, he surprised me as a pretty good speech giver and kept the crowd in it, from what I could see. However, by the time he spoke, what little caring I had left was gone and it soon descended into womp womp womp. Yeah, I probably wasn’t the best person for this assignment.
Once again, we made it through another day. Today, more Trumps talk, We Make American something or another Again, and $5 says someone will protest about heaven knows what, trying to get their fifteen minutes of fame. That’s all from this RNC recap that turned out way more bitter than I figured it would.
*And if someone finds the rum, please forward it to me. I think there are two more days left of this madness.
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